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Are You A Sex Addict?
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 Alok is back home after a very stressful day at the office. He watches a little TV, puts on some soothing music, even tries to unwind with a warm bath but nothing helps him to relax. No matter how hard he tries, the only thing that can relax him is sex.
Usually he masturbates, most often while watching porn, but this time he chose to have sex with his wife and relax in that manner. His sexual escape did relax him but only for the time being. Alok realises that whenever he is stressed, the only thing that works for him is sex. Is he hooked? Is he a sex addict?
Thinking about sex and indulging in sexual fantasies is a very normal process of life. But how does one differentiate between having a healthy sexual appetite and being sexually addicted. How can you tell when you have crossed over from simply being a person who enjoys sex tremendously to being a sex addict?
Here are some questions that you can ask yourself to determine whether you're an addict or not.
- Have you ever felt that your sexual behaviour is abnormal?
- Has your sexual behaviour ever caused problems in your relationships?
- Is sex the only thing on your mind, so much so that you cannot work properly and are distracted all the time?
- Do you spend a lot of time surfing the net for porn or having e-sex?
- Are you a member of more than one porn site, strip club, adult clubs or have subscriptions to multiple erotic magazines?
- Do you usually have multiple sex partners at any given time?
- Are you open to picking up strangers in clubs or bars to have sex with them, even in today's age of AIDS?
- Do you indulge in any sexual activities that are illegal?
- Have you ever paid or been paid for sex?
- Are you obsessed with any kind of sexual activity and have tried to give it up but could not succeed?
If you find that you have answered yes to two or more of the above questions, then in all likelihood you may be addicted to sex and should seek help from a professional.
If you're a sex addict, you're not alone...
Millions of people all across the globe, including numerous Indians, are addicted to sex. Their sex addiction is mainly due to two reasons:
- They believe sex to be the only way they can deal with problems and use it to escape reality
- They are afraid of intimacy and use sex as a substitute for the real deal
People who are addicted to sex and find that they need more sex than what may be considered normal, may stray outside their marriages and relationships to find additional sex. They may also turn to masturbation frequently and in the process can stop having sex with their partners. Either of these scenarios can spell doom for a relationship.
Partners of people who are sex addicts generally ask questions like, 'Is it me?' 'Don't I satisfy my partner?' 'If s/he really loved me they would get some control over their sexual activities'.
However, as is the case with any other type of addiction, even sex addiction is an illness and the addict may find it impossible to get out of the sex trap on their own. Thus, if you feel that you or your partner may be addicted to sex and are unable to control the addiction no matter how hard you try, it may be time to seek professional help for your sex addiction.
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Ruchi Agarwal
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